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Happy Birthday, Megan

Happy Birthday, Megan!

Paris Hilton Still Sucks

As promised by Max in the comments yesterday, here’s Paris Hilton’s song Screwed. Sorry, Max, I believe she still sucks. The song has potential, but she? Does not.

Batwoman Returns

The big comic news this week seems to be the return of Batwoman. She’s here and she’s queer!

Jesus Pan!

Jesus Pan! What I like best about this is the insinuation that you can make money from selling your “miracle jesus bread.”

Canadians healthier than Americans

A new study has shown that Canadians tend to be healthier than Americans. Is there anything Canada can’t do? Besides allow its citizens to compete on The Amazing Race? In related news, many young adults in the US don’t even have health insurance.

Beautiful

Perfect. [via]

Paris Hilton plans reggae, hip hop album

In news that will send scores of people in search of screwdrivers to jam into their ears, Paris Hilton is putting out a reggage/hip-hop/pop album. “I think that is the hardest thing you can do, to sing in front of people,” she says. Really? See, I would rank “showing America my vagina” a bit higher on the scale than “singing in public,” but that’s just me. [thanks to soosan for the link]

Ben Affleck is rushed to hospital

Beth has alerted me to the fact that yesterday my boy Ben Affleck was rushed to the hospital. Apparently he had a migraine. And this is the part where we make jokes about his giant oversized head.

Memorial Day Weekend

So, children, did you do anything fun this weekend? I drank a lot of beer and I believe I broke or fractured one of my toes. Oddly enough? Those two things are NOT related. Friday we saw X-Men, and while we were at the movies, we got an offer on our condo. We should see the contracts today. I’m trying to not care, in case it all falls through. Saturday was the day I busted my toe, so I stayed on the couch most of the day with ice, which SUCKED. Sunday was a BBQ at my parents, which was fun, and even with a gimp foot I was able to play goalie in a pickup soccer game with the kids (okay, I just sort of stood near the goal with a beer and wildly kicked the air every now and again), as well as get my ass whooped later on at backyard bocce ball. Yesterday our friends Liz and Jill had a big old pool party and BBQ, which was superfun. Everyone laughed at us because we travel with our own cooler and beach chairs. What? We’re professionals. We also made some new friends and caught up with old ones. Yay.

Today, the weekend has caught up with me and I am exhausted. Or perhaps the exhaustion comes from stupid Meena, who has an ENDEARING new habit of jumping on my chest repeatedly starting around 4:30am and meowing in my face with her nasty breath.